Call it fear, call it your shadow, call it your dark side—whatever you want to call it, we all have part of ourselves that we try to hide.
Whether it’s fear of being vulnerable or fear of being judged, we can have a tendency to hide away a part of ourselves from others or from putting out who we truly are in the world.
I remember when I first started my coaching business—I had never run a business before therefore in the beginning I was feverishly trying to figure it out. So I tried to be everyone else. I watched what other coaches were doing—the greats such as Tony Robbins or Fabienne Fredrikson. I would try to emulate them in some way but something just didn’t seem right.
Then I chose to sign up for every coaches newsletter I could get on, hoping to find what I was looking for in their words. I ended up with 3 million emails a day and more confusion about who I was and what message I was trying to share with the world.
I kept trying to be everyone else than me. Why? Because I was afraid.
I was afraid I wasn’t going to “do it right”…
I was afraid “they” wouldn’t like me…
I was afraid of being seen…
I was afraid that “they” had it all figured out already and there was no space for me
Most of all I was jealous.
I felt so jealous that everyone seemed to know who they were and what their message and mission in the world was and I didn’t. I was jealous that people were having more success than me. I was jealous that they had more followers/likers/readers/clients than me.
But there’s wisdom in that jealousy if you can look deeper. Slowly I learned that the feeling of being jealous was inspiration for what I wanted to be doing and where I wanted to be going.
I remember at one point feeling insanely jealous over one coach who was hosting a retreat at a remote island destination <<BIG clue to me that I was inspired to host my own retreat when the time was right>>
It was only after shifting my mindset to see these feelings of fear, inadequacy, and jealous for what they really were—an opportunity for me to get in tune with myself.
While I allowed those feelings to feel paralyzing for so long once I shifted my mindset, I could really see what was underneath my shadow side—a deep desire to learn who I was and what I wanted. All that negative noise in my head began to quiet down and I could find me.
And when I listened to me, here’s what I found out:
I started to drop my judgment around needing to have it “all figured out” and began to embrace the pace of building a business….
Shifting my mindset was so powerful but it was going to take PRACTICE to stick…
I unsubscribed from nearly all of those coaching newsletters because I wanted to go within and listen to my own voice…
I could share my voice and stop comparing it to Tony Robbins because my ideal clients wanted me, not Tony (sorry, not sorry Tony.)…
That once I was vulnerable, there was plenty of space for me because lots of people heard themselves in the details of my story…
Is it all easy? Nope. They say that the things that are most worth it aren’t always easy but what I did learn was that only by going through the fear, jealousy, and pain was I able to call upon the wisdom that was lying beneath it all along. And that wisdom was me.
Have you ever felt paralyzed by fear and a feelings of inadequacy?
Have you ever felt practically sick with jealousy (only to know deep down it was because you saw something that you wanted)?
Shifting your mindset is a game changer—it can take us out of a place of feeling powerless to stepping into being the creator of our powerful life.
Are you ready to own your power? I would love to see how I can help. Click here to speak with my team and find out how you can make a shift in your life.
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Are you ready to figure out what’s holding you back? I would love to see how I can help. Click here to speak with my team and find out how you can make a shift in your life.